Amanda at Pandagon made a few interesting comments in a discussion of e-Harmony, the online dating site. I didn't know this until recently, but e-Harmony has a historical connection with Christian communities and organizations. So it turns out that the majority of its users are pretty Christian.
The company doesn't have to be upfront about its interest in "family values" type Christianity in order to attract almost nothing but that demographic. The fact that the TV commercials emphasize marriage as the end goal of the people who join up is enough to ensure that's the result.
With all these fundies running around talking up the institution of marriage a value in and of itself, a right and responsibility of those lucky enough to be straight, an obligation that we need to take on in order to fit in, and the only right way to have a family, is it any wonder that dating services like this are filling up with people who are trying to slap a ring on as fast as humanly possible?
[...] most non-religious people want to marry someday, but the official reason that you give for dating is to have some fun and get laid. If love and marriage happens, it's a happy accident.
She then goes on to posit that Christians who see their "need" to get married and have children as a religious obligation wouldn't be that good at the dissembling required for successful dating, and so they very well might benefit from a service to connect with others who want to "dispense with the bullshit and get to the wedding." She contrasts these folks with the presumably non-religious types who only have marriage as "a vague goal in the distant future" while dating.
I couldn't help but laugh. A chuckle, not a mean laugh. Her post is called "Who makes marriage the end goal?" Well, that would be me. But we'll note that it's 2005 and I'm still not married (again), so I'm obviously not just running straight to that end goal regardless of the cost.
I'm not quite sure how to articulate the rest of my thoughts on this, but it struck me as strange that she was identifying people who have marriage as a strongly articulated goal only as people "dispense with the bullshit and get to the wedding" and "slap a ring on as fast as humanly possible."
