How I Imagine the Conversation Goes

The Princess: How are you?

Dog Two: Fine.

The Princess: I ask because we've been outside for a while, and the mosquitoes are kind of biting the fuck out of me, and you haven't yet gone to the bathroom.

Dog Two: I'm eating a leaf right now.

The Princess: I can see that.

Dog Two: Can we go in?

The Princess: I don't think so. Remember yesterday when you went inside and then we had to clean up after you?

Dog Two: Hey, there's a bird!

The Princess: Yes, it's very nice. Do you need to do anything out here?

Dog Two: What's this on the pavement?

The Princess: A dead bug, and you don't need any.

Dog Two: Hey, I have to pee!